We’ve just finished another e-commerce holiday season, and the world survived. No thanks to the all-news cable channels and their broadcast brethren. If you listened to their coverage of Internet shopping, you heard horror story after horror story about rip-offs, identity thefts and scams. To hear them tell it, the online world is the e-Wild, West, a virtual landscape filled with thugs, mugs, and various and sundry unsavory character just waiting to slaughter the sheeple brave or stupid enough to enter their credit card details online. The media does the public a disservice by publishing such scare stories—especially when consumers run a much greater risk of credit card fraud every time they eat out. Yes, gentle readers, your local eaterie poses a much greater threat to your identity than buying an ugly Christmas sweater online.

It’s a fact. Given the current state ‘o the web, the chances of getting your identity stolen online are statistically equivalent to your odds of being mauled by a bear in the middle of the ocean. It could happen . . . but it’s not bloody likely. On the other hand, ever wonder what happens to your credit card when your friendly waitstaff takes it away from you to pay for your meal?

Usually, nothing much save the ding. But the fact remains: an unscrupulous waiter or waitress can carry a battery-powered gadget to swipe your credit card data (literally and figuratively) faster than you can say “Honey, did you buy an HDTV the other day?” And it’s virtually impossible to protect your card; they can do it anywhere between your table and the cash register. And they don’t have to be particularly subtle to get away with it (restaurant owners are sometimes in on the deal).

Let’s put online identity theft in its proper perspective. In 2009, the Federal Trade Commission traced 43 percent of all identity to stolen wallets and physical documents. Online methods accounted only 11 percent of identity theft crimes. According to an 2004 ITRC study, 43 percent of victims knew the ID theft perp.

While online identity theft / credit card theft online is a growing threat, it’s a small slice of a slice of the overall fraud pie [see: above]. Online credit card theft is also electronic, which makes it susceptible to electronic counter-measures (as opposed to real plastic vs. real world policing). Between secure transaction servers, SHTML, SSL certificates and the like, buying online is appreciably safer than paying for your meal when dining out.

Stories of nefarious waitstaff would adversely affect every mom-and-pop eatery in the country. So they don’t get traction. Consumer affairs reporters prefer to invoke the boogieman of online thieves. The average computer owner has no clue how e-commerce works. Where does the information actually go? An unknown Internet threat is far scarier than some fresh-scrubbed college student who brought you veal piccata—even when said co-ed is supplementing their income with a little identity theft.

In fact, the credit industry needs to put their money where your mouth eats. I’ve long advocated battery-powered, wiFi credit card terminals for restaurants. You could keep your card in hand and swipe it yourself, as you do at any store. While we await an outbreak of common sense, wary customers should insist on settling their bill at the register (not always an option) or pay cash when they eat.

Short of physical preventative paranoia, the identity protection services aren’t the infomercial-ish bad deal they seem. The reputable services are effective at protecting your identity online AND when you shop / eat / play in the real world.

Should you be afraid when you shop online? Of course not. But you should always be what the self-defense guys call “situationally aware.” If a commercial website looks cheap and nasty, it may be a harbinger of data doom. If a site offers Uggs for a price that seems like a steal, it probably is. While the likelihood of online identity theft is relatively small, it’s not non-existent. Take that as you will.